THIS JUST IN: Malaria killed King Tut! No kidding. The latest forensic tools have revealed this info, and it was just made public today. It may be the oldest cold case on record. What a relief–I thought it was his cat allergies.

And speaking of cats–have you heard of “chatroulette”??? When I first saw that written down I was horrified- “What? They’re playing russian roulette with cats in France????”

Then I realized it was something even more insane–it’s “chat” as in “chatting,” as in “ChatRoulette” a website that automatically turns on your webcam and suddenly you’re faced with random people all over the globe, one at a time!! If you like the looks of them you can interact. If not, you just click “next” and go on to a new face. And they can do the same to you. It’s an endless cycle of acceptance and rejection, nirvana and nightmare…and imagine the scenarios one stumbles into. Sam Anderson in NEW YORK magazine reports coming upon a guy fornicating with a head of lettuce (and that’s just the tip of the iceberg), hot babes who click him off,a Swedish artist speed drawing people’s portraits, musicians coming up with ditties on the spot, and assorted pervs, wackos, and psychopaths.

What would King Tut have thought?

Now I’m really out of here..